A Blog about Leadership

Listening is an important skill for leaders.

William Arthur Ward on the progression from listening to leadership:
“We must be silent before we can listen. We must listen before we can learn. We must learn before we can prepare. We must prepare before we can serve. We must serve before we can lead.”

Tom Peters on the listening, innovation, and where ideas come from:
“If a manager is really willing to listen, he or she will find that the average employee is loaded with ideas, most of which the manager can allow the person to try. So the first step toward innovation is getting into the habit of listening. The second is getting into the habit of letting your employees try to do their work in slightly different ways.”

The Art of Listening

So how do you get people to talk?  By good listening.  You may start by asking a question or making an inviting statement, but don’t forget to stop talking and listen.  If there is a silence for a few seconds, people get compelled to talk, but wait it out until the person starts to talk and then engage them in a conversation by:

1. Making eye contact.

Don’t stare them down like you’re in the OK Corral, but definitely make eye contact.  It sends the message that you are paying attention.

2. Don’t fidget or slouch.

You body language sends strong messages, so you need to pay attention to what your nonverbal communication is saying.  Fidgeting sends the message that you are in a hurry, nervous, or thinking about something (and not paying attention).  Slouching sends the message that you are bored, uninterested, or tired.

3. Listen twice as much as you talk.

When I was in my teens, I had a youth pastor who always told me that God created you with two ears and one mouth, so you can listen twice as much as you talk.

When you talk, keep your comments and statements to a minimum.  You need to contribute to the conversation, but you don’t want to influence what the other person is saying.  Ask questions and ask for them to expound on what they are talking about.  Always encourage them indirectly to keep talking.  Once someone starts to talk, they will become comfortable and talk more.

4. Remember what was said.

You actually need to pay attention and remember what was said.  Not remembering a conversation or remembering what someone suggested will discourage future conversations.  The dialog doesn’t end after you stop talking; it should continue the next time you get together and talk.

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